BangFit: The fitness method gyms don’t want you to know about
No prizes for guessing the method.
If there’s one thing that Pornhub is good at that doesn’t involve a satisfying break from work, it’s getting people to pay attention to its plans. The company’s latest attempt to remind everyone where to get their action from comes in the form of Bang Fit, which purports to be a smartphone-based sexercise platform. The idea, as far as the site is concerned, is that getting down and dirty is a better way to workout than whatever your personal trainer can tell you to do. Plus, it has the added benefit of keeping you relaxed and connected with yourself and your significant other(s).
Simply head over to the Bang Fit website and tell it if there’s one, two or three players enjoying a session this evening. You’ll then direct your smartphone’s browser to the mobile version of the site and use a code to pair the two together. You’ll then be treated to a hardcore porn movie on your desktop as the phone tracks your movement and awards points. There’s even a Guitar Hero / Just Dance-style icon telling you when to thrust and when to hold back.
Naturally, your smartphone can’t track your motion from the bedside cabinet, so you need to hold it close to your body. The company recommends tying it to your stomach, perhaps using a belt as an impromptu holder. The firm has also pledged to produce a limited number of dedicated smartphone sex sleeves for the purpose. although these are not available yet.
Much like the company’s other initiatives, like the WankBand through to its plan to film the first adult movie in zero gravity, there’s very rarely any follow-through. After all, your attention has been held long enough to remember that Pornhub exists, but you won’t forget when it doesn’t deliver further down the line. Of course, the company did actually produce the Twerking Butt, so maybe we all just need to learn how to delay our gratification a little more.
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